Rewls.com

Only Fuck With Certified Virgins

First dates are tough, and now with CertifiedVirgin.com you know what you’re getting. Just ask them to see their certificate of virginity, that way you know they don’t have any of these diseases:

AIDS (Acquired Immune Deficiency Syndrome)
Genital Warts
Gonorhea
Syphylis
Herpes
Chlamydia
Pubic Lice or Crabs
Vaginitis
Hepatitis

You don’t want any of that shit. Tell your bitch you want her certified, it [...]

Santas Demand Flu Vaccine

Holiday mall Santas see tons of kids over the holiday season, and are asking that they get priority for the vaccine. This makes complete sense, and I hope the Santas get their vaccines — if they don’t it could be bad.
If one kid had the swine and gives it to Santa, about 100 other kids [...]

Lindsay, Cayman, & Tiger Woods

Lindsay Twitters In A Jealous Fit Over Ex-Girlfriend Samantha Ronson
Lindsay Lohan took to the web in the early hours of Tuesday to rant about ex-girlfriend Samantha Ronson.
Hurricane Ida Buries Porsche Cayman In North Carolina Beach
It even managed to sink a Porsche Cayman into the sand of Cape Hatteras, North Carolina. Best buried treasure ever?
Tiger Woods [...]

Facebook’s Relationship Updates

Recently Facebook underwent a redesign, and at first was completely rejected. Facebook didn’t care and knew all the junkies would still come back for more.
The re-design has brought a few new features, and one is pretty interesting. In the relationships feed, when someone is engaged or in a relationship, Facebook’s photo tagging system automatically displays [...]

Costco Banning Coke

Wholesale giant Costco is having a bit of a pricing dispute between Coca Cola. From what I understand Costco wants to be buying Coke stuff way cheaper than they are as they’ve decided to ban selling Coke products in their stores.
Costco isn’t going to take any Coke products off the retail floor, but if they [...]